Quando doni la vita dai il meglio di te

Una lettrice, Antonietta Campana, ci ha mandato la traduzione dell’intervista in inglese che padre Sean Salai ha fatto a Costanza Miriano

Perché hai scritto questo libro?

Veramente pensavo di non aver niente da insegnare sul matrimonio e la vita di coppia! Volevo solo scrivere delle lettere ad alcune amiche reali (ho solo cambiato i loro nomi e qualche dettaglio) per convincerle che è possibile imparare ad essere felici nella vita quotidiana matrimoniale. Infine, volevo parlare di Dio che è la fonte dell’amore, anche di quello di coppia. Ma non ho mai, mai pensato che lo avrebbero letto così tante persone. Per la prima uscita, ne sono state stampate qualche centinaio di copie. Ero sicura che le avrebbero comprate solo mia mamma, mia sorella e le mie vecchie zie. Non ho mai pensato che potesse diventare una cosa di queste dimensioni.

Chi è il tuo pubblico?

Quando scrivo, io penso di parlare ad una donna occidentale emancipata, che è passata attraverso il femminismo e le sue conquiste. Una donna grata di poter avere la possibilità di compiere delle scelte nella vita. Una donna che ha tutto ma è insoddisfatta perché ha perso il senso della sua missione in questo mondo: essere la culla della vita. Quando scrivo penso alla mia collega tipo: molto brava nel suo lavoro, in grado di viaggiare in tutto il mondo raccontando di guerre e crisi finanziare, o penso ad ingegneri, avvocati, docenti universitarie, mie compagne di classe, o anche alle madri dei compagni dei miei figli, segretarie, parrucchiere, donne normali che sono cresciute con l’idea di dover realizzare se stesse e, solo dopo, di pensare agli altri. Ma una donna può essere soddisfatta solo quando dona se stessa. Continua a leggere “Quando doni la vita dai il meglio di te”

Are you really called to die for her?


You better believe it! What else is man made for, but to die for a noble cause…? The good of your wife (and your family)? Well, there aren’t a whole lot of better causes out there, are there?

Man up, because Costanza Miriano is back in Marry Her and Die for Her. Guys, if you thought you were off the hook after Costanza’s first book Marry Him and Be Submissive, you’ve got another thing coming. Now, she’s here to challenge you and give it to you straight about the many ways in which you must die for the woman you love. (But don’t worry…she has plenty of reminders for the women as well.) Inside, Miriano provides insight into what women want from men, and how husbands can “die” for them and their families every day, including:

•  Remember how much your wife liked flowers, compliments, chocolates and romantic dates when she was your girlfriend? Guess what? She still does.
• Remember how much she wanted to impress your mother when you were dating? She does not care as much about that now…
or at least she shouldn’t, and neither should you.
• The old saying goes: “Lead, follow, or get out of the way.” Never mind that…just lead! The other two are not options. Democracies are fine for countries—some of them—for families, not so much.
• You know how tired you feel sometimes (all the time)? Get some rest. You need it! (We thought you would like that one.)
• Be there. Turns out the old saying is true…showing up IS half the battle. • Oh, and lest we forget…if you haven’t done so already, Marry Her!

Miriano doesn’t just dole out advice; she comes bearing gifts as well. Chief among them are the gifts of sword and shield—the shield to defend your wife, children, even your free time once in a while; and the sword to cut away all that is unhealthy and destructive in your most important human relationship. And, oh yes, she encourages men to return to, or start anew, a life of prayer. A man who knows Christ knows true sacrifice and so will be better able to truly “marry her and die for her.”

Marry Her And Die For Her – Chapter 3

Continua a leggere “Are you really called to die for her?”

Marry Her And Die For Her – Chapter 3


The problem with love is that many people mistake it for a stomach ache


Love isn’t just a feeling

Marry Her And Die For Her (Sonzogno 2013),   Costanza Miriano  

If there is one thing that makes me feel bad, apart from seeing a scorpion, it’s when in my fervent activity of unrequested preacher I realize I have hurt someone, most often a woman, since at the receiving end of my persecutory phone calls, bristling with gratuitous opinions, there is almost always a female (to a man with a problem you may at most give a virile slap on the shoulder, or buy him a beer, because talking to him will only make matters worse). Sometimes I happen to hurt people, I know, because I always go down a little too hard, I am as delicate as a 100-tons truck entering a narrow medieval alley. When I talk, I feel the urgency of giving the world the gift of my word, and of doing it fast, rather than prudently turning on the mode “think before talking, and pray before thinking”. It takes too long, and I am always in a hurry, because when one is saving the world, there is never enough time. Continua a leggere “Marry Her And Die For Her – Chapter 3”

CBB Review: Marry Him and Be Submissive


Review by Julie Abell

I literally jumped at the chance to read and review the book, Marry Him and Be Submissive by Costanza Miriano, an Italian journalist living in Rome who is married with four children.  It was a hit in Italy where it was published in 2013.  It was just translated into English and is hitting the US book stores now.  It caused an uproar in Spain and I don’t doubt it will do something similar here in the US, while at the same time also receive nods of agreement from many married women.  The reason I was eager to read and review this book is because of my background, training, and experience.

read more – patheos.com

Appunti di viaggio a New York


di Costanza Miriano

Mentre il volo sta per riportarci nell’amata Roma, mi viene voglia di condividere un po’ di quello che ho visto a New York. Più che averne voglia – a dir la verità avrei un gran sonno, non so bene neppure che ore sarebbero secondo il mio corpo – mi fa piacere condividere quello che mi porto a casa. Se una mia amica fosse partita, io vorrei curiosare tra le cose che ha visto, soprattutto le più insignificanti, tipo come ci si veste per correre o che borsa va di moda (se poi parto con l’analisi polito-sociologica potete sempre smettere di leggere). Continua a leggere “Appunti di viaggio a New York”

Smile Please or Being cheerful is a tough job, but someone has to do it


Chapter 9 of “Sposala e muori per lei” [“Marry her and die for her”],

by Costanza Miriano   –  traduzione  Caterina Poggi

The main problem, the reason why I cannot really blame too much my friend Cecilia for her complaining, is that she does have actual reasons to be unhappy. She works at a job she doesn’t like: she wanted to paint and be a photographer; instead she has to fill out forms in an office with a low fertility rate and female coworkers all wearing leopard-print and sequins already at eight in the morning, who grow more and more sour every year (I think that must be the local headquarters of the infamous Office for the Complication of Simple Affairs). To commute to and from this torture chamber, she drives for three hours every day at an average speed of seven miles per hour; when she finally gets home at night she has just the time to wipe the milk and cocoa spilled by her pre-adolescent kids who are playing video games, to open the door of the laundry closet and shut it again immediately, before the pile of clothes collapses, to put on those sad slippers that I have been scolding her about for years, before she eventually welcomes home a man whose eloquence, whose verve, whose sparkle would make Kim Jong-il pale in comparison. Continua a leggere “Smile Please or Being cheerful is a tough job, but someone has to do it”

About submission


by Costanza Miriano

First of all, let’s make something clear. We all must do our part. Some people talk the talk, others walk the walk. I am applying for the talking job, because walking the walk is too exhausting.

When we talk – in whispers, to avoid being lynched – about submission, we need to escape from the language of the world, which reads everything in terms of control, of power. Our King is on a cross, but this is how He defeated the only invincible enemy: death. We too, therefore, must get out from the logic of power, and turn it completely upside down. First of all, because submission does not mean depreciation; you don’t choose it because you consider yourself worthless. Second of all, when a woman makes this choice, the fruit is the fact that her man will be willing to die for her.

When Saint Paul tells women to accept being submissive (literally, to stay under), he does not think at all that they are inferior. In fact, we owe the first great appreciation of women to Christianity… The submission Paul is talking about is a gift, free as any gift, otherwise it would be a tax. It is a spontaneous gift of oneself, a gift made out of love. Continua a leggere “About submission”

Marry Him and Be Submissive

 Are We Really Called to Be Submissive?


tanbooks 2016

Wives, be submissive? Really? Well, yeah…and here’s why: It will lead to a more fulfilling marriage and life!
In Marry Him and Be Submissive, Costanza Miriano dishes on all the hurdles and difficulties that real women face in dating, marriage, and motherhood. In a series of letters to her closest friends, Miriano offers sage, frank, and hilarious advice on:
• Whether to keep waiting to get married(No! Dive in! You’ll never be 100% “ready.”)
• How to stop worrying about all the cushy “first world problems” and embrace the true joys of family life (even if it means cutting back on Facebook a little)
• What it means—really means—when your husband doesn’t seem to be listening (he’s probably thinking about soccer, but he still loves you)
• How to maintain your life after pregnancy (you can’t! It’s over! But your new life will be so much better)
• How to get through the day after you realize your kids went out with dirty underwear, or worse, no underwear (hint: wine helps) Continua a leggere “Marry Him and Be Submissive”

Sposati e sii sottomessa, edizione USA

sposati int

E’ uscito nei giorni scorsi negli Stati Uniti Sposati e sii sottomessa in lingua inglese (tradotto da Ronnie Convery), edito da TANbooks.

Marry Him and Be Submissive è disponibile sul sito della TANbooks e su Amazon anche in versione kindle.

Il 7 settembre ci sarà una presentazione a New York nel West Village,  organizzata da teleMATER presso la Chiesa

Our Lady of Pompei 

238 Bleeker Street, New York, NY

il 7 settembre alle ore 19.00

Nei prossimi giorni verranno pubblicati dei post in lingua inglese per la promozione del libro.

Continua a leggere “Sposati e sii sottomessa, edizione USA”